Not to be outdone by the appearance of Clint Eastwood at the RNC, The DNC also has a celebrity appearance scheduled.
O.K. so Clint's speech probably won't go down in the annals of great speechifying, but when I'm 82, I hope I can speak that well. Hell, when I'm 82, I'll be tickled to be able to speak at all.
Anyway the cat is out of the bag: The Mystery Celebrity Speaker at the DNC will be, fresh from the Betty Ford Clinic, none other than Lindsey Lohan, speaking at length on the topic of "The Impact of Central Banking Marginalization on the Viability of Alternative Energy Planning Variations". The address will run 30 minutes or until Ms. Lohan passes out, which ever comes first.
It may well be the high point of the whole convention.
Update: I may have spoken too soon. Turns out she may well have been a good pick.