Wednesday, March 25, 2015

Newspeak



When I started out in engineering, I was privileged to work on equipment to be used by the astronauts on the then brand new space shuttle. I was told that whatever I did, it was to be idiot proofed to the best of my abilities as the crewmen were already heavily occupied and didn’t need anything else added that required much concentration. This practice paid off later when I worked on consumer and industrial products as well although I learned that “idiot proof” is a utopian concept and “idiot resistant” was probably the best one could hope for.

I have been informed that while I’m at work on my current job that the terms “idiot proof” and “idiot resistant” are NOT to be used within the hearing of the production staff as some of them might take it as an affront.We have, I'm told over 20 cultures represented.

In order to avoid having to smooth some ones ruffled feathers by fighting a ritual duel in the parking lot or having to agree to marry one of their daughters, the terms “idiot proof” and “idiot resistant” will both be replaced in all communications, written or verbal, with the expression “management friendly”.

Likewise I am thinking about offering a suggestion to the HR department that instead of punishing the native staff for being American, they make an effort to help the “differently cultured” members of the staff blend in seamlessly to their adopted nation. I’m sure they’ll be happy to get such a helpful suggestion.

2 comments:

Merle Morrison said...

The problem with idiots is that they are so determined.

Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large numbers.

Merle

Billll said...

Isn't that the definition of a Congress?